What I Look For in a Girl
People sometimes ask me if I have an actual list of things that I look for in a girl. For a long time I didn’t, mostly because I figured that a successful relationship was a lot more about giving than it was about getting. So I put aside thinking about who I wanted to be with and instead made a list about who I wanted to be. In some ways, it was a healthy approach … it kept my focus in the right place and, frankly, steered me away from some unhealthy relationships.
Even so, it’s been pretty easy, over the years, to notice which characteristics attract me and which are uniquely suited to my needs and gifts. And eventually, as I started to realize how screwed up this area of my life was, I began to see how valuable it was to be more aware of where I’d like to head and to be more proactive in how I chose to get there. Making a list was just a logical part of that process … so I did!
And now, for some strange reason, I feel like it’s a good time to give y’all a sneak peek into what makes me tick. So here it is … my list.
===== What I Look For in a Girl =====
THE EMOTIONAL
gentle and compassionate
joyous, loves to laugh with abandon
genuinely longs to be loved
stable and relatively rational
comfortable with risk and sacrifice
vulnerable, feels things deeplyTHE PRACTICAL
thrives on adventure and wildness
leaves things (and people) better than she found them
advocates for those without a voice
makes intimacy relevant (brings sexy back)
communicates with kids on their level
truly listensTHE LIFESTYLE
pursues eternity first
practices lordship and fleshes out scripture
lives simply and frugally
would travel or even live abroad
loves her family and wants to raise her ownTHE PHYSICAL
sensitive and sensual
deep eyes that connect
cuddle-maniac
moves like an athlete
slender body, elegant back and neck, soft lobes
hands and lips that make me melt
eager to be wild in bedTHE CHEMISTRY
ruthlessly challenges me on my idiocy
helps to stretch and soften my spirit
encourages my hunger for righteousness
makes me want to lead her through the storm
can both keep up with me and slow me down
makes my heart do that thing
Keep in mind that these aren’t “requirements” or “must-haves”, they’re simply characteristics that catch my eye. And this list is organic … as I discover new things about myself, this world, and my God, this list will continue to grow and change.
So what do you think?
June 29th, 2008 at 4:12 pm EST
For just a moment there, I thought you were about to reveal that you had X-ray vision…
June 30th, 2008 at 12:13 am EST
Hi, Lance…I discussed exactly the same question with a guy yesterday….What do i look for in a guy…in a nutshell, feeling is the most important to me at the first step…
June 30th, 2008 at 11:13 am EST
Gee,
Maybe you will get Jesus and gravity (I do not know what I am saying, it is the song title from American idol).
I just could not forget the image of the wedding picture a long time ago you put in your site,
June 30th, 2008 at 2:08 pm EST
Yeah, I don’t know what you’re saying either, Jiajun … a Dolly Parton song? Haha …
And Selena, it’s great to see you and that awesome smile of yours again. I hope you’re still singing your way through life … thanks for stopping by!
August 11th, 2008 at 8:58 am EST
I already had the utmost respect for you, but you have gained more, my friend. I think it is so honest, genuine, and absolutely reasonable to find someone out there like that, and it is my prayer that you do. You deserve this much and more.