Sobering

today I got this email from my cousin:

--------------------
On Saturday, I took John to a math competition at Jackson Middle School. I was glad to be a part of his mathematic life as he went through 3 tests and scored #1 in the contest in mental computation. Just 24 hours later, a tornado tore through that part of town and tore the roof off of the very school and room we were at. It's food for thought to ponder that if the tornado had been there a day before we would have been part of that mass destruction. We do not know when the Lord will take us home. The important thing is to be ready.
--------------------

it was quite sobering. i've had several incidents like this in my life, where i've narrowly escaped death or cheated life. and it just makes me think about the brevity of life in general. i'm not really guaranteed anything, not my next meal, not my next breath. not even my next sente

Fat Cat

Rodger Degagne, a former employee with AECL in Chalk River, may be embarking on a new career as Feline Breeder. Relaxing in his spacious home on the shores of the Ottawa River, Mr. Degagne recalls how 15 years ago he befriended two stray young cats on the old AECL research facility at Chalk River. The kittens had appeared in late summer and apparently had gotten under a security fence around the old labs abandoned since the late 50's. With the help of his tuna sandwich, Mr. Degagne was able to coax the kitties close enough so that he could pick them up. A self-described animal lover, he did not want to place the kittens in the local Humane Society. In this largely rural area, cats of all stripes and ages largely go unwanted and are humanely disposed of after a few days. Later that evening his wife Louise and their two children, Nicole and Kelly, came to a family decision to keep the kittens which they named Lost and Found. Lost turned out to be female and Found a male. When nature finally took it's course, a litter of kittens was born 6 years later. One of the litter was a big white female with a unique black markings on her side and tail. Something about the kitten captured the hearts of the family and while her siblings eventually found homes elsewhere, Snowball stayed with the Degagnes.

While Lost and Found are no longer with us, their progeny live on. In her 9 years Snowball's size has seemed to snowball. Put simply, Snowball is no ordinary cat, she measures 69 inches from nose to tail and weighs in at 87lbs.

"She started out a big kitty and she just seemed to keep growing. She always meowed for more food and would climb up on the counter to eat food which I forgot to cover. Chicken is her favorite. Once I left a cooked chicken on the table that I was going to use for a boat picnic, an hour later the chicken was gone", Louise said.

"We knew that Snowball wasn't your average cat when the neighbor's German Shepherd ran yelping away from his first encounter with her. She just isn't afraid of any animals. After we found a half eaten raccoon out by the garage, we decided that maybe Snowball should be kept fenced in. We soon discovered that while we can keep Snowball in the yard, we couldn't keep raccoons from Snowball. At least it kept the food bills down!" Rodger laughed.

"Like all female cats she is very territorial, but with us he is just a big ole kitten" he said. So what does a 87 pound cat eat? Snowball goes through a about 3 lbs. of cat food a day, along with cooked chicken, supplemented with deer and moose that Rodger hunts in the fall. "She likes pike a lot, so I don't throw them back any more." Snowball often accompanies Rodger fishing on the Ottawa, eagerly peering over the side of the boat as soon as his line goes tight.

So, to what do the Degagne's attribute Snowball's size? Rodger says "Well, the vet thinks it could be her thyroid, but she isn't fat, she's just a real big cat. I think maybe her parents got into something at Chalk River that they shouldn't have."

The War Effort

I just heard that Canada has pledged 2 of their biggest ships, 600 ground troops and 6 fighter jets to help America with the war on terrorism. After the American exchange rate, the US ended up with 2 Mounties, 1 canoe and a flying squirrel. Craziness, I tell you, craziness.

What? I Eloped?

Last night I had a funny experience. I woke up with something brushing on my leg, and the first thought that went through my head was "Am I married already?"

It turned out that Cody, our dog, was scared by the storm and decided to sleep in my bed with me. But I think it's hilarious that I woke up and thought I was married. :)

Good Lookin' Runners

Blabadi Blah Blah Blah

tonight i just feel like typing a little, sans capital letters. the past week has really been a blur ... partly because i've been really busy and partly because i'm just getting worn out with the school year and such.

track is really taking up a lot of time, but it's crammed full of little joys. this week, for instance, we had the chca home meet on monday, then today and tomorrow we have the lockland invitational, a two day running extravaganza. as i think i've mentioned before, these kids totally float my boat ... they are seriously some of the most amazing people ever. not only are they great competitors, many of them trying to overcome some bigtime odds (including injuries, inexperience, and most notably puberty), but they also are just great people. they're encouraging, full of life and energy, wide-eyed, and motivated. they love just hanging out and talking, getting track advice but also just enjoying life together with me and the other trackies.

and track is such an amazing place to be a leader, a mentor, and an example of character. we all have a common purpose out there ... to work hard, learn some skills, and compete at our best. so we're honing all the time, thinking up strategies and perfecting physical feats. on top of that, these kids are just learning this sport, and physical fitness in general, so each small idea or process is a big deal. moreover, the fact that there's so much downtime in track (waiting for events and such) simply means that i get to talk to and advise the others. plus the fact that it's so individualized means that each runner decides how much to put into it and get out of it. finally, i actually have quite a bit of knowledge and experience with track (i was a hurdler and high jumper), so i can actually help these kids (rather than just make up stuff and sound authoritative).

so yeah, track is good. but there's quite a bit else going on. it seems that at work (school) stuff is just piling up incessantly ... big issues like purchase orders for equipment and policies for the lab, and little stuff like miscellaneous print jobs and things that need fixed. i'm getting so tired, really to the point where i want to take a week off and just chill. but if i would do that, stuff would pile up even more. hopefully this summer i'll get a chance to really set some things straight ... come up with some procedures and solutions that take the daily work out of my hands and place responsibility elsewhere. i also need to establish a much stricter code of conduct and tone in the computer lab ... i think it could pretty much run itself if the kids knew the rules and knew that there were consequences for breaking them. hopefully i won't have to become a drill sergeant and turn the lab into a morgue, but i think many of my headaches could be eliminated with a higher standard of behavior and more specific lesson plans.

i am so looking forward to camp ... just being out there, under the stars, with the ability to be carefree and jovial with everybody. i'm going to start calling the counselors this week to get to know them a little better ... hopefully some mutually awesome relationships will start to form. i really care about these guys already ... they've committed to spend their summer building into kids' lives, and that's a huge job (even if they don't know it yet ... he he he). but i love the fact that they're out there, and that i'm in a position to really dig into them, see who they are, and meet their needs intimately. i miss college students so much ... i'm still only a year out, but i've been spending most of my time with junior high kids and older married adults. we're a rare breed, single carefree twentysomethings. yes, we are.

i'm still uncertain where i'll be living next year. i told rob and jen (my current landlords) that i'll be moving out of the house and into my cabin at camp on may 25th. after the summer, though, i'm hoping to return to a new location. i desperately will need to be closer to school, as i anticipate that my job will be much more demanding next year (and i might also be going for my master's degree online). but apartments near school are so incredibly expensive ... i really can't afford to live there by myself. i could live in fairfield or even hamilton, but that's still a little bit of a trek. i'm considering putting an ad in the paper, or in church bulletins, looking for a home that needs some help. i'm sure there's an elderly couple, or a young family with too many kids, that needs some help around the house. the tricky thing is to find a place where i'd have my own space ... where i'd be able to live my own life, still help them out, yet be autonomous. rob and jen are incredibly gracious (i live in their house, for heaven's sake!), but in the end they don't really need me to be there. it is a gift that they're allowing me to rent off of them. i want to start giving back.

tonight there's a storm, and cody's curled up on my bed. he's terribly afraid of storms. how cute. oh, by the way ... cody's a dog.

i keep running into people, or hearing from people, who are extremely surprised that i'm doing what i'm doing now. it's amazing to me how many people know me as "the crazy lance kid" ... the boundlessly-energized try-anything never-growing-up guy. they say that they've always kinda known that i could be responsible, but never really imagined me actually doing it, especially at my age. and it makes me wonder ... was i leading people on? did i always leave an impression that i was a fickle person? because inside of myself, i've had clear direction and motivation, responsiblity and maturity, brewing for years and years. i've been building an understanding of what it means to be a man, only to unleash that when it was needed.

granted, i drastically failed a few times. like with love ... i thought i knew when to step up and be a man of God, and found that i stood up when the raft was still being inflated (causing a loud "ABANDON SHIP!"). i wasn't exactly the most inspiring leader in intervarsity in college. even though i was the president of our chapter, i almost treated it as an organic project, a chance to undermine the typical example of top-heavy leadership and allow people to learn through discovery and even mistakes (gasp ... is that legal?). and in my own personal direction and vision, i intentionally decided to drop any ambition or desire to collect a "plan", just to make sure that my philosophical and theological inklings were right (you know, that God is truly in control and all).

[sidenote ... i was right ... He Is.]

so anyways, now these people are surprised. if only they could see me in the element that i'm in ... being childlike in the middle school. i love that.

ok, i'm getting exhausted, and even though there are many more things to be said and probably much more to be done, i'm going to let my muscles collapse into a heap. thank you, Lord, for your blessings today. it really was an awesome day. please give me sweet sweet rest, so i can return tomorrow full-bore, on the balls of my feet and focused on the finish line.

Midgetal Camera

Now this is quite interesting ... "the world's smallest megapixel digital camera" ... for only $169 ... called the Cubik Digital Camera ... I wonder if it'd be osX compatible?

I just installed iPhoto on my iBook today, and it really looks like a nice way to organize and import photos. Hopefully in the next version Apple will make it a little sleeker and much more powerful. iTunes and iMovie are definately consumer-level jackpots ... the digital hub, they call it. Bring that on.

Many of the rumor sites are noting that Apple is buying up some pretty amazing smaller companies, companies utilizing Bluetooth (what will soon be the new wireless standard, like USB and Firewire are with wired things now) and 3D-rendering and animation programs. I wonder how long it'll be before Apple adds an aniimation/3d graphics piece of software to its suite of applications? A website design program? iPage, perhaps? You know it's gotta be in the works.

Oh, the Irony

I actually got a forwarded email (grr, I can't stand them) with the following excerpt in it today. Note that I removed the actual email (where it says [blah] for your protection:

> This is an actual true story and not one of those Internet
> stories that are passed on and on ...
>
> [blah blah blah] ...
>
> ... so be safe and pass this on to your friends.

Aw, thanks!

This week is Teacher Appreciation Week. Which, in plain English, is simply Feed the Teachers Week. Every day we've had free food and meals, plus students coming in with cookies and chocolate for us. How awesome is that? Today I got this particularly touching card:



So simply stated. It almost seems like Alan didn't really know what to thank me for ... notice the clear absence of any adjectives. I'm not a good teacher, or a fun teacher, or even an interesting teacher. I'm just a teacher. But he thanked me, nonetheless. I'll take it!

For Your Entertainment

My brother said that this cartoon reminded him of me. Yes, it's true, I used to twist balloons in restaurants for a living - my name was Mister Twister. And I love to draw, and sing, and take pictures. And I used to be pretty good at massages. But a restaurant with tablecloths? Come on, that's nothing like me.

immersed in emotion

i just got back from what was quite possibly one of the best movies i've ever seen ... i am sam. at first watching it made me want a girlfriend, to share the moment with. then it made me want a wife, to cry with and nestle close to. then it made me want a child, to delight in the joy and brevity in each moment, the ears that get bigger and eyes that get older.

after a while, my self-absorbed desires ceased, and i found myself immersed in emotion. lost in the wonder of the storyline, i forgot to think of love as something i owned and began to gaze upon reality ... that it's all way bigger than something i can grasp. witnessing beauty can be ruined by trying to grab that very same beauty. it's like looking at a butterfly ... when you reach for it, it flies away and leaves you with only the memory of wonder.

[how much would i learn if i could only keep my hands to myself?]

faded edges, the blurry focus, the canvas's texture ... that's where the painting comes alive. it shouldn't take a movie to help me realize the extraordinary in every ordinary person and place. it shouldn't be hard to look into someone's eyes and know that i cannot own them. it shouldn't surprise me that the most profound thoughts are always uttered by the lips of the childlike.

Whoever Said Golf is Boring?

This is possibly the Best Videogame Ever. I'm addicted.

Webolution

Concentrate on the dot in the middle of this picture then move your head closer and further.



Pretty sweet, eh?

A Day in the Life

so i'm lying here on my bed, feeling the cool breeze through the window as i gaze on a wonderful southern ohio sunset. what a weekend this has been. i went to my first chiropractic appointment, played Fugitive (a night game) in the dark on miami's western campus, crawled through the mud playing paintball, cleaned up a month's worth of mess and six month's worth of paperwork in my room, watched a movie, went to a hilariously exciting girls hockey game starring some of my dearest college friends, talked to some junior highers about abstinance, avoided doing my taxes, washed louie (my car), ate some cheeze-zits, and replenished my supply of toiletries.

i am sam is playing at the bargain theatre tonight at 9 something. i really want to go see it, but i still haven't finished my taxes. plus i'd like to start the week off with a good night of sleep ... i'm teaching a technology workshop for the teachers at school tomorrow morning at 7am. what a predicament ... so what did i decide to do? get online and type a blog entry. i'm such a webel. i mean, a rebel.

i have too much stuff. the more i look at it all, the more i just want to get rid of more of it, to simplify my life and get rid of the material things. i want to be like this notebook computer i'm typing on ... streamlined and compact, totally portable and without unnnecessary frills. like my clothes ... it seems i have this huge collection of things to wear ... but why? i could potentially live with 10 tshirts, but i have over 100. or a couple of pairs of dress pants and nice shirts, but i have dozens. i'm just afraid that if i get rid of it, i'll "need" it the next day (isn't that how it works?). perhaps i'll have a goodwill fest before camp this summer.

i can't believe steve kerr is still around ... he's bringing the portland trailblazers back to beat the lakers on television with his three point shooting. his championship chicago bulls years are long enough ago ... but i even remember his cleveland cavaliers days, with mark price and larry nance and the crew. man, i'm old.

ok, i'm going to go finish my taxes and put together my lesson plans for the next two weeks. i'm actually going to make a handout for the kids, a worksheet that they'll need to fill out. aren't i ambitious? :) bring it on.

Spring Is Upon Us.

"My shorts symbolize rebirth. They give people hope for new beginnings," said New York City UPS delivery man Greg Gullicksen ...

I Need A Taxative.

Oh, man. I just finished filling out my taxes, online, using TurboTax. At first I was intending to do the paper version, because it's free, but then I realized how much I can't stand paper. So I went online and answered their relatively painless questions. Then I hit a brick wall. Or a couple.

At first it told me that I had a federal return of $933! That rocked! But it only rocked for a moment. For in a few moments, it came back and told me that my return was only $411. Hey, don't get me wrong, I'm still quite excited about $411, but how on earth could I lose $522 in one minute! I don't even gamble!

Then I realized that it had never asked me about college ... you see, I payed for my education, so I should be able to claim tax credit with the Lifetime Learning Credit, on form 8863 (I did my research). But TurboTax kindly neglected this option ... so now I think I have to go back after all and fill out the paper version before I submit it. Grr. This is totally crazy. Why can't we just live in an autonomous democracy, like in Monty Python and the Holy Grail?

Don't they understand that it's all worthless, that it's going to burn eventually anyways?

From Wired magazine, May 2002, page 49. This is truly in the news:

The Gas-X Factor

Cow flatulence produces some 80 million tons of methane worldwide a year - the greenhouse equivalent of 1.7 billion tons of carbon dioxide. Entrepreneurs smell opportunity. By supplementing cattle feed with molasses and urea, the Virginia-based Global Livestock Group reduces bovine emissions in the third world. GLG measures the greenhouse savings (using patented ruminant flatulence-monitoring technology), then sells it as an offset to power companies needing to comply with tighter greenhouse emissions laws.

Worst Analogies Ever

These actual essay experts by high school students are courtesy of Brian Martin:

The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't. (Russell Beland, Springfield)

McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty Bag filled with vegetable soup. (Paul Sabourin, Silver Spring)

He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it. (Joseph Romm, Washington)

Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze. (Chuck Smith, Woodbridge)

Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever. (Unknown)

He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree. (Jack Bross, Chevy Chase)

The politician was gone but unnoticed, like the period after the Dr. on a Dr.Pepper can. (Wayne Goode, Madison, Ala.)

John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met. (Russell Beland, Springfield)

The thunder was ominous-sounding, much like the sound of a thin sheet of metal being shaken backstage during the storm scene in a play. (Barbara Fetherolf, Alexandria)

His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free (Chuck Smith,
Woodbridge)

The red brick wall was the color of a brick-red Crayola crayon. (Helen Hopp, Yucaipa)

Ouch.

i told Erica to shoot me with a rubber band, so she did.

a feeble morning

Lord, i totally feel like a failure. i just got out of a class where the students didn't want to learn, they were being very rude and disrespectful to me, and they just couldn't handle any kind of organized activity. we even tried playing the froggy game (a simple kids' game) and they couldn't handle it. they were feeding off of each other's attention and saying inappropriate things, etc. and i just didn't have the will to yell at them (nor did i have the words to say). and they're all stuck together in the same class ... the students who just plain have a bad attitude.

but don't get me wrong, i'm not trying to blame them ... it just really got me down. i still have so much to learn about being a teacher. and there are so many students at this school that are so mature, so encouraging, and so in love with learning, that i often forget how hard a time middle school is for kids. they're seeking attention, acceptance, and love, but don't understand exactly how to ask for it. they're becoming aware of a world that's bigger than them but have been told that they need to act big and strong to control their world. in a way, i don't relate to that much ... i was pretty oblivious in junior high, not really into any social scene and relatively friend-less (except for a few fellow nerds). but i need to relate.

Jesus, i thank you for giving me the grace to come this far. thank you for letting this affect me so deeply, and i pray that you will continue to soften my heart, that i may have compassion for these little men and women. help me to see through their eyes, understand their hearts, and listen to their words. and as i continue to grow in character and experience, i pray that you will use me ... not my words or actions or lesson plans ... but use me to influence their worlds. you have placed me in relationships with many of them, given me time to spend with them. just please let me see the fruit of this. i ask not for gratification, but for motivation.

truly, You Are.

myBook

now this is absolutely crazy. i'm typing this blog entry on my brand new Apple iBook ... a completely surreal experience. i haven't owned a computer in years and years (yes, even though i'm a computer teacher by trade) ... but circuit city was having a deal i couldn't pass by ... and the more i thought about it, the more i really did need a hub for my digital life. i've been living off of computers at work and school and friends' houses forever, accessing things directly through the internet but never really keeping anything centralized. this should rock.

i'm not going to waste time typing all the amazing specs in here ... you can look at the apple website if you're interested ... it's the 600 mHz G3 with a 12.1" screen, 128mb of RAM, and a DVD/CD-RW drive. bring that. at this point, i'm still a little skeptical ... i'm not sure that i need a computer at this point in my life (i have access at school and such), so i may still be taking it back in the next 2 weeks, but for now it really is a blast. i'm honestly feeling a little guilty ... spending over $1000 for something for myself is pretty hard. we'll see ...

My Philosophy of Teaching?

When I was in college, my major was Speech Pathology (eventually). I had no intention of ever becoming a teacher ... sure, I took some education classes, and even student taught (as as part of my requirements for my major), but I never envisioned myself becoming a teacher. Now, here I am, a year later, teaching fulltime. And I just came across something rather interesting ... an assignment I did for a class. We were supposed to create a "Philosophy of Teaching." I had none. So I made this up, an hour before I turned it in. And it's quite interesting.

To give you some context, I was student teaching at the Bobby B. Fairfax School, an MRDD (Mentally Retarded/Developmentally Delayed) school for children with extreme physical and mental needs. It was an amazing experience where I learned so much about life (most notably the wonder of life itself). I also student taught in the Centerville School District, where I was able to see a setting much like what I'm in at CHCA today socioeconomically (without the Christian content).

In the following paper, I pretty much sum up how humbled I was by my student teaching experience ... and that has continued through today. I can honestly say that much of what I said back then still holds true. And it's mostly unmeasurable stuff ... like getting to know students on a personal level, connecting with them and building trust ... that I still believe is the most vital part of being a teacher. The learning experience is so much bigger than a stack of books or series of memorized facts ... it needs to be connected to real living people and experiences ... and I have the honor of being one of those people. Bring that on.

Ok, I'll stop blabbing ... here's the paper:

Philosophy of Teaching (so far) Lance A. Webel February 26th, 2001 Because my teaching experience is still in the early stages of development, it would be quite foolish to assume that I have already established a well-developed Philosophy of Teaching. I have, however, had quite an experience, and from that I will draft my Philosophy of Teaching (so far). First and foremost, I am here as a servant. My job is to do whatever I can to help the children, and that sometimes takes great sacrifice of time, priorities, resources, and comfortability. My agenda cannot rule in this setting, even with other professionals. I am here to serve. If I am to help the child communicate, I must first establish joint attention. In other words, I need to become a part of their life and build trust on an interpersonal level first if I am to expect them to learn to communicate through their time with me. I must be an encouragement and gentle support before I can be a therapist. It is quite interesting to note that at the Bobby Fairfax School I am pretty much clueless about the medical or communicative case histories of the children. Sure, I know many of their goals and know what we�re doing to work on those goals, but aside from the children with Down Syndrome (which is quite visibly recognizable), I really don�t know what�s �wrong� with the children. They�re simply Robby, Nashia, Rick, Antwan, and Penny Sue. In retrospect, I am thankful for this, for I know each of these children for who they are, not what they have. Too often people, especially SLP�s, meet the disability before they meet the person. To me, their name is more vital. I have had a hard time dealing with authority and my role as a student teacher so far. Sometimes I just don�t understand how to act or where to take charge when there�s another SLP in the room. I don�t want to step in and take away his authority, and likewise, I don�t want him interrupting the interaction I have with the kids. This makes it very difficult for me to collaborate in classrooms and even do therapy with another adult in the room. Thus, a big part of my Philosophy is to know exactly what my role is and clearly communicate that with other professionals so I can be free to help the kids as much as possible! Finally, I will always be a student teacher. There is so much to learn, so many skills to acquire and new philosophies to add to this list � to say that I am done being a student would be foolish. I will not become stagnant nor will I close my eyes and ears to the wealth of teaching that my fellow professionals, children, and their parents have to share.

Kissing Cousins

my cousin just sent me this link:

Study: Marrying Cousins Not So Risky

uh, i'm frightened.

Fighting Terror with Fins

Terrorism has hit these shores, and I have decided that it is my duty as an American citizen to fight back. I don't care if I become a target for terror as a result of my stance. I think this is the time for action, not silence ... so I've put an American flag as the backdrop for my classroom fishtank.





Take that, Osama Bin Laden!

No Polygamy Here

My Mormon name is DeLance Welcome Exile!
What's yours?

The following is an article published in the middle school newspaper, The Eagle's Nest News, by two of my students, Vincent and Clayton. It's a fine piece of investigative journalism, and I thought they deserved some publicity. After you read it, you'll be able to vote on who you think the culprit of this horrible crime actually is.

Flushed? ... You Be the Jury!

By Vincent Riley and Clayton Webster
Originally published in the March 2002 Eagle's Nest News

Jaws is missing!

Jaws is the name of Mr. Webel�s massive fish; scientifically, it could be described as an iridescent catfish. It grows quickly and its eyes cannot see glass. It is a relative of the shark, an herbivore, and plays dead. He was missing and assumed murdered...but you can read the case and decide for yourself.

THIS IS THE CASE OF THE MISSING FISH

It is a brisk December morning�Tuesday, the 18th. Mr. Clark and Mr. Webel enter the computer lab together. Mr. Clark walks over to the fish tank where Mr. Webel keeps his exotic fish. Suddenly, Mr. Clark notices that there is one fish missing. When Mr. Webel comes over to see which fish is missing, he realizes...it�s Jaws.

With suspicions arising, we took it upon ourselves to investigate this quagmire. First, we approached Mr. Webel and got this first-hand introduction, and maybe even a few suspects to this peculiar case. He said, �I walked into the room one morning with Mr. Clark...and he told me Jaws was missing. Shocked, I tried to come to a consensus about why Jaws had to die. He was always such a good fish, except for the time he internally dissected three of his fish roommates. And from then on, I have simply been trying to put the incident behind me�Later I found out that Mrs. Anderson was the first one to actually discover the dead fish. However, death is a struggle that we all have to deal with at some time or another.�

After talking to Mr. Webel, we realized that the true answer to the case lied in talking to Mrs. Anderson. So we sought her out to get her take on the story. Upon questioning, Mrs. Anderson stated that she was working late one night when she discovered the dead fish. She called the janitor to come and �take care of it,� and then left before the fish was actually removed. Once again, if you refer back to the scientific traits of the fish, you would remember that it can play dead when it feels threatened. Could the fish simply have been playing dead, or was it truly deceased?

After the interview, a new suspect was introduced into the equation: John the Mainentence Worker. So once again, we tried to locate him for an interview. We found that he had been moved down to the elementary building soon after the tragedy of Jaws dying. We asked him about the incident, and sure enough, he remembered it quite well. This is what he had to say, �I walked into the computer room for my daily cleaning. I walked over to the fish tank to check on Mr. Webel�s fish. I always take a look at [Jaws] because it is so huge! Anyway, when I got there I saw the fish bottoms up, and its gills weren�t moving. So, I wrapped it up and took it outside to the dumpster to dispose of it. I didn�t want to leave a dead fish in the room.�

Well, now we have more suspects than we anticipated. We have Mrs. Anderson, Mr. Webel, John the Maintenance Worker, and maybe even some outside force� Well, you get to be the jury, and help us decide what caused Jaws� death. Was it foul play, a mistake, or natural causes? We will be taking polls to see what the majority rules. Look for the poll results in May�s issue of ENN.

Yours truly,
Clayton and Vincent

Want to voice your opinion?
Click here to vote on what you think Jaws' fate was.

Will Work For Food

oh my ... i've started to get handouts. two students (Suki and Chapman) dropped their lunch leftovers by my office today. i guess i've become the local charity case ... yes, i admit it, i still eat like a poor college student.

Me Gusta La Biblioteca

There's just nothing like it ... a clean, well-stocked resource for any common citizen who is responsible enough to be trusted. A hub of media, information, and knowledge. A treasure chest of activities and clubs. A haven from the constant attacks of a profit-driven capitalist society. A gathering place for scholars and hobos alike. Yes, that's right - it's your public library. Can I just say that I love that place?

[of course I can, it's my website]

I have in my back pocket a little plastic card that is my key to freedom ... to adventure and new horizons. I can walk in with only that thin rectangle and walk out with stacks of books, movies, music, and shelving units. of course, i'd get arrested for walking out with the shelving units, but that's beside the point. The point is, I walked into a building I've never been in before and found the answers to my growing tax-return questions, a new free class on caligraphy, and 4 never-before-seen (by me) DVD's for my couch-potato-esque pleasure.

I think more of this world should work like the public library. Initially, there is a small and lenient background check to establish a basic level of trust. Quickly, however, full access is given to a wealth of free and public resources. As long as responsible and punctual care is taken, that level of trust remains. Any slips, and small incremental punishments accrue. Major mishaps demand a greater loss of privaledges. Overall, though, there is no system of hierarchy, no cutthroat consumerism, no compartmentalized individualism. Community and common experiences build through mere proximity and shared interests. And it's all based upon trust.

Just imagine ... homes and apartments based on the same philosophy. Transportation and post-secondary education. And even furniture and clothing! Of course, the "borrowing" period may be longer, with different requirements for punctuality and care, but the same basic premise could rule ... trustworthy until proven otherwise! We would be drawn to each other as we depend upon one other for our needs, as we realize that it's not about owning stuff but about the benefits of growing and learning and actually using the resources we have.

I mean, come on - why should a trustworthy young man like myself be caught in the quagmire of trying to find a clean and safe place to live without signing away years of my life (or throwing money into the breeze)? Why should I be forced to live in isolationism as I gather the "essentials" of surviving in a materialist society? Why can't we simply have more padded toilet seats? Why, I emplore you!?! We need to have more trust in each other ... we need to rethink the system ... we need to embrace the cooperative environment of a comprehensive shared life resource.

And I need to pay off my $9.60 library fine.

Spring Break Pics

I promised that I'd post some pictures of my trip to New England, so here they are. I'll make sure to put some clever captions on them - that's what all the kids are doing these days. Yeah. Enjoy!


A view of Boston from atop the Bunker Hill Memorial


I really liked this section of the sidewalk. Bricks rock!


We saw some really famous dead people. And a squirrel.


Good thing Kevin's not standing by this sign.


Yeah, they're right, St. Francis really was a sissy.


Public nudity? Jaws and Shaniqua would be ashamed!


Yes, we vacationed on the beach [in a blizzard].


Caleb and Nathaniel are experts at making trucks honk.


Here I am with my twin nieces, Naomi and Claire.


Nephew Caleb sure has some pearly whites!