Actually ...

When I was in Akron a couple of weeks ago, I saw this road sign (on Smith Road before going down the huge hill). It took me a while to realize what was wrong ... then I actually read it. I had to scramble to get my camera before the light turned green (and I took the picture in the dead of night, hoping the reflective surface on the sign would pick up my flash through the wind shield.

Shouldn't it say "STOP HERE TO ACTIVATE SIGNAL"? Actuating a signal sounds a little new-agey to me ...

He Who Laughs, Lasts.

Move to Iceland.

Here's a pretty funny switch parody.

Can You Say Doubletake?

The billion dollar twins are going to Miami.

(note: i apologize in advance for the popunder ads when you leave the site. i tried to find another news website with the story but couldn't. down with the credibility of cnn.com.)

Today's Trivia

• 50% of all Americans live within 50 miles of their birthplace.
• 85% of all Americans live within 15 miles of an Apple Retail Store.
• It's impossible to lick your elbow.
• Mel Blanc (the voice of Bugs Bunny) was allergic to carrots.
• The world's youngest parents were 8 and 9 and lived in China in 1910.
• Coca-Cola was originally green.
• Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury.

Anagram of the Day

If you rearrange the letters in "presbyterians" you can get "britney spears."

Miscellaneous Musings

I'm sorry this site has been so slow in recent days ... it's all because of YACCS, the service I use to produce the comments. I'm getting closer and closer to switching servers and providers, but I simply don't have enough time to commit to it right now. Actually, I do have enough time, but I've learned that once I start a creative process (like overhauling a web site) I become maniacle (is that how you spell it?). So it'll wait for now.

I'm currently sitting at school for Open House (a.k.a. Sit For Four Hours As Families Trick-Or-Treat For Cookiecutter Answers Day). It's an interesting phenomenon, as we're required to be here in full garb (blazers and all), telling parents the same 4 things about our classes over and over and over and over. I was actually very tempted to use Macintalk (my iBook's speech synthesizer) to say those sentences automatically over and over when people enter the room. But alas, I decided to be a good teacher and remain here, patienty counting the minutes.

I made my final move into the new apartment yesterday. It's pretty awesome ... it takes less than two minutes to drive to school. I've started noting some of the pros and cons of where I'm living compared to where I was living two days ago.

Pros
my own bathroom
great water pressure in the shower
foosball and air hockey
location, location, location (close to stores and highways and library too)
a great dog named Montgomery
no television (I was getting addicted to the electric drug)
a carport for Louie
much more space

Cons
colder (especially in the bathroom)
no oven or stove
not as much storage (shelves, drawers, etc)
no Internet (i'm not going to add a phone line)

Tomorrow I'm having the Fellas (eighth grade guys) over for a Super Bowl Party. It should be a blast ... I'm gonna hook up a projector with the game, get the foosball and air hockey going, and hopefully fire up some wings (in my trusty little microwave). It'd be nice to move in before that, but if I don't get done I'll just shove it all in my bedroom and close the door.

And tonight we're having a Slam Jam (a youth rally) up at camp. Those are always a blast. New this time, we'll be doing Jumbo Jenga (made out of 2x4's) and glow-in-the-dark Jello Twister. It's gonna be good ...

Now That's Efficiency.

The Vital Warning Sign

I just discovered today that when I'm starting to get really dehydrated, my boogers get crusty.

I'm Moving!

Yes, as if there weren't enough variables in my life right now ... I've decided to change homes this week. I wasn't really planning on it, but one of my fellow teachers asked me if I was still looking for a place to live (I had asked her last summer if she knew of a place). I wasn't, but still inquired about the details.

It turned out that she knew a family from her church that has been trying to rent out their basement. Here's the catch ... it's only a mile away from our school (just north on Snider Rd.)! After trudging through 20-30 minute wintery rides to school (and to Apple), the thought of rolling out of bed mere minutes before I had to be there really sounded appealing. So I checked it out, and it really turned out to be a nice place (and even in my price range!).



I told my landlady (Helen) about it, and she happened to already have an ad in the paper for another apartment. I told her she could show my place as well, and within one day she already had a renter. So I'm moving a little stuff each day this week (then moving myself on Friday).

I'll post some pictures later, once I take them. It has a wood-burning fireplace, a tiny little kitchen with a fridge and sink (and my microwave), a small room (that will become my bedroom), a bathroom, some storage in the back, and a large living area. There's a foosball table and an air hockey table and a few couches there, and Therese happened to have an extra bed that she's going to loan me for a while. So I'm set!

Bubbles

Hmm ...

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Unchecked Puberty on Ice

You know what cracks me up? Clips of adrenaline-clad hockey players trying to start fights on the ice. They act all hot and big, like they're in charge of everything, thinking that their tough glares and violent swings are actually helping the hockey game. I just watched a full-out fight between two teams before their game even started. If I could skate fast enough, I'd love to go out there and just laugh at them. Laugh and say, "Just walk it off, dude. Just walk it off."

Factoid of the Day

The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28%
The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%

What a Crybaby.

Fo Real.

I just bought a plane ticket.

To Africa.

Passprints

Ever forget a password? As long as you haven't recently cut off your fingers, you're ok. Sony is planning to release fingerprint identification for the Mac this spring. It'll use a USB device and software that works with Jaguar to replace your old password identification with biometric identification (fingerprints). Pretty sweet, eh?

Bored Games

Last night was really fun. I went up to camp to hang out with Steph, Stenger, Amber, and Ryan. After some dilly-dallying, we all met over at the maintainance building to pursue one of Amber's brainchilds ... Jumbo Jenga.



That's right, we were making Jenga out of 2x4's. After Matt and Amber cut them the right length, we sanded down the corners and edges. We'll be using the Jumbo Jenga at next week's Slam Jam up at the Preble County Fairgrounds. We're also going to write fun tasks on the blocks so when someone takes that block out, they have to do the task (for instance, "take out another block with your teeth" or "change shoes with the person on your left") .



Eventually we got tired of it, so we went to Bruno's Pizza with a bunch of regular-sized board games (we considered bringing the Jumbo Jenga game, but didn't want to get kicked out). We ended up playing an epic game of Sorry while we ate some pizza and spaghetti and meatballs/ketchup/mustard/beef (don't ask ... Steph has a weird appetite). It was fun. :)

Yes, This is a Human.

Is It Possible?

I've never seen a woman put mascara on with her mouth closed.

I'm Turning Into My Dad.

I'm teaching the kids in all my classes how to use Microsoft Excel. Their assignment is to create an opinion poll using a multiple choice question, survey their class, then create a spreadsheet to display the results in a table, pie chart, and with an internal equation. Here's what Robert Fogg just turned in:



Very funny, Mr. Fogg.

Planned Anti-Parenthood

You need to read this article and this article. I have a lot of thoughts on this subject, but I'm going to reserve them until you've read it for yourself. Please do. This is important.

Begone, Foul Plushtoy

Apparantly a Vancouver, Washington family bought an evil toy for their baby son from Wal-Mart. The toy, a plush boat-like thing with the brand name Toy Connection (Wal-Mart's generic brand), quietly utters the words "I hate you" when you push a button.

I just tried to find the toy on Wal-Mart's website, but it was nowhere to be found. If you can find the toy at a Wal-Mart near you, let me know. I'd be interested to hear it. And maybe give an exorcism or something. :)

Finally First!

This is great ... after months of hard-fought battling in my Yahoo! Fantasy NBA league against the venerable Dunfee, Jonny Reardon, Jeremy Abraham, and others, I have finally emerged from the trenches in first place! I don't know too much about the NBA or all of that, but it's been my quest to win this thing. So I go in each day and pick up noname people who are doing really well and try to get some bulk numbers from them. It's really fun ... I feel like I'm finding little loopholes in the system, playing the game how it wasn't meant to be played. :)

Actually, it's still the middle of the season, and I don't know how long it'll last. I'm having a hard time with my free throw percentage, three point percentage (even though I'm leading the league in three pointers made), and assist-to-turnover ratio. I'm just going to continue trying to put up bulk numbers and hope that'll carry me through.

WWJD2

They're serious.

Lyrics of the Day

"All princes start as frogs,
all gentlemen as dogs.

Just wait til it's plain to see
what we're growing up to be.

Cause some frogs will still be frogs,
some dogs will still be dogs.

But some boys can become men,
just don't kiss us til then."

-- Superchic[k], Song 4 Tricia

Man, It's Cold.

Fun With My Phone.

I'm convinced that somebody unplugged Sprint PCS tonight. I was intending to make a ton of phone calls tonight to last year's camp counselors and some prospective counselors for this year. But according to my phone, I'm currently on Analog Roam. In an effort to avoid the $4/minute roaming charges (I'm exaggerating, of course), I got in my car this evening and drove around. I went in a complete 5 mile radius, touching all nearby major highways and trying about every trick I could think of with my phone (except for duct-taping a wire hanger to the antenna). After my 20 minute mini tour of northern Cincinnati, I'm convinced that somebody has unplugged Sprint PCS. Bummer.

So I was stuck at home, doing dishes. And in the midst of that, I made a drastic decision. Overwhelmed with the high pile of dishes I've been doing week in and week out, I decided to consolidate my inventory to 1 plate, 1 bowl, 1 glass, 1 mug, 1 fork, 1 knife, and 1 spoon. I will now be forced to wash my dishes before I can eat or drink again. That should do it.

Oh, if you haven't checked out "Fun With Your Phone" (below) yet, check it out. I think it's pretty fun. :)

Lyrics of the Day

"They tell me to abandon You
to make my dreams come true.

So what am I supposed to do
if I only dream of You?"

--Tree63, All Because

Fun With Your Phone.

1. Call 1-800-555-TELL
2. Dial 1 (or say "extensions")
3. Dial W-E-B-E-L (or say "93235")

Carwash!

Quotation of the Day

"Never ask a man what kind of computer he drives.
If it's a Mac, he'll tell you. If not, why embarrass him?"

--Tom Clancy

Whoopsies!

Oh, that stinks. I messed up on one of my links on the last entry (yes, I was careless), and now there's no way to fix it. I can't even access the post to delete it. That's one thing that I don't like about Blogger. One of these days I'm going to spring for it and switch to a server where I can run Movable Type. That'll be the day.

Anyways, what I was going to say is that I'm about to finish the updates to the PVM website today. We have a ton of new things going on this year ... here are a few of them:

• We'll have an expanded pool deck area with in-ground speakers placed around the pool.
• The dining hall kitchen will also have a new look with a new serving area to help expedite meals.
• We're in the process of building a 400-foot zipline across the pond.
• We're introducing a new camp called Aqua Camp for kids who like water skiing, wake boarding, and tubing.  Campers will travel to a nearby lake and be trained by national water skiing champions Cliff Martin and his family.
• We're also introducing Advanced Horse Camp, which will allow experienced horse riders to learn the basics of jumping, barrel riding, trail riding, and a two-day trail ride and camp-out.
• The all-new Backcountry Horse and Cattle Drive will give experienced horseback riders a four-day trail ride into the pristine woodlands of eastern Ohio and allow them to participate in a cattle roundup on the last day. I might even get to go on this trip!
• Finally, experienced rock climbers will get to experience what it is like to scale cliffs and camp in the great outdoors of Kentucky in the new Red River Gorge Expedition.

Oh, yeah. In addition to all of those changes, I also created a new website for potential staff. Check it out ... I'm really proud of it! And if you know someone who's interested or available this summer, let me (or them) know. We've already started getting applications in!

After a relatively uneventful morning at Apple, I came home and decided to wash my car. Nevermind the fact that it was 21 degrees outside (my housemate looked up the temperature just to verify that I am certifiably insane), now Louie is clean and crisp. Right when I was finishing, I found out that there's an indoor self-serve carwash down the street that costs $1.25. Perfect timing, eh?

After consumiong a wonderful lunch of burritos, nachos, and root beer, I decided to come to school to get some things done. I found a great deal on an AirPort card for my iBook this morning ($59.95), so I installed it when I got to school. How refreshing it is to "install" something on a Mac. I simply turned it off, lifted up the keyboard, and plugged it in. No screws, no drivers, no software ... when I turned my computer on, I was automatically connected to the Internet wirelessly (we have 12 wireless base stations within range of my office). How refreshing.

So today I'm planning to complete all of the updates to the